“a**hole”…dude where is that old angry Crushed? Man I expected at least a “she has been with this low life, piece of chit, a**hole, cheating, nasty, ugly motherf*cking di*kwad. JK, sorry I had to get that out.
Hey Brother that was awesome. That guy is still rattling around in my melon but I'm secure in the knowledge that he's scared shi*less of me. I cycle through the a** whooping, violent fantasies; watching him scramble around for his chicklets after I've caved his skull in. But, it would only serve to push her further away. I realized this long ago. The big guy never wins. You get pushed around and you're a pu**y; you retaliate and you're a bully.
I can't tell you how much I appreciate the thought put into your post here. You're on the "chain gang" too with real tough times in the immediate rear view. Best wishes on an improved sitch in 2011.
I am much more positive entering this year over last. But the demons still exist. I'm so accustomed to being stomped on that I have a hard time knowing when its enough. Maybe the graying hair I now have is allowing me to think less of my image. I still look dam* good but I am beginning to care less what people think of me.
The ice cream I've served up with her cake can't last. Whatever catnip douche is serving can't outlast the fact that she and I both know there are things unresolved.
Today was her birthday and she was suffering from a bladder infection - which she often gets. Yet I brought the kids over to celebrate. We came back to her place later with cake, balloons and flowers. But I know she gets the infections after sex. So I find myself wanting to care for her (in obvious pain) but sickly gratified that she is suffering for her betrayal.
However, I need to find peace. And with the peace some happiness. It is slow in coming, but the last year has provided a path. With happiness I can pleasantly decline her invitations to interact - and maybe (or maybe not) she'll realize what's disappearing. Either way, I will be more fulfilled than I was the last year.
A belated toast to 2011 Eric, and another step toward resolution and satisfaction. Cheers!
but I am beginning to care less what people think of me.
