It's been a week since I've had contact with H. He has another week and a half to go before he goes before a judge. It's still very, very surreal what my life has become!
I do wonder what he's thinking--if anything. Apparently he is telling everyone I fell!! Yeah, that's why I still have a headache/neckache 1 week later?!!
My friend took me out for the most incredible day yesterday. Went and got pedicures, lunch, and bought me a new lock for my front door. We NEVER lock our doors here--weird huh! And I am not the type to freak out and think my H will come back to kill me, but she is.lol.
Her H came and installed it--I just am too blessed!!
And my sister has a divorce attorney for a client who talked to me for a while yesterday--she knows my attorney and says she is very good. She is willing to help me with the settlement agreement and FOR FREE!! Yeah!
I'm ready for a "battle", but I'd like to settle. I just don't think what my H is offering is anywhere close to what I need to survive. My father-in-law has asked me to write down what I want and I'm trying to get motivated to do it, but...the events of the past week have been a nightmare and my mind is not focusing on this stuff.
D4ML, what is happening in your sitch? I know these guys are angry--it doesn't matter who files. All parties are disappointed/angry. It's a loss on both sides. I feel badly for H. I wonder what more I could have done all the time. I luckily had this forum and really worked it--it gives me a lot of peace that I did.
And in my heart will I completely stop DBing? Probably not. I seem to have it in my DNA to focus on his positives and be helpful to him--he isn't a horrible person. Just lost. I have no problem forgiving him. He did love me to the best of his ability, but he is terribly insecure. I have no idea why. But controlling behaviour, like his, is rooted in fear and insecurity.
In a way, he is so pathetic that I am grateful. There are some exH's on here that seem to have it "all together". And if that was my H I think I would be plagued with feelings that it was more "me" than "him".
My H has given me a gift of showing EVERYONE that he has problems.
