The only benefit I can see from you relinquishing control over the D settlement is you assuring her that she can trust you, but that's it.
When my W told me she was planning to visit OM in another state, I went ballistic and threatened to pack all a stuff and leave it in the front yard for when she got back. She totally lost trust, talked to a lawyer and put one on retainer adding to our credit card debt. Now she's paranoid about everything I do. So establishing some trust is a good thing.
Only you know your sitch, just be careful and do not act on emotion and feelings, act wisely. We all care about each other here and the advice should always aim to get you to a better place. Don't ever forget: the M may not be saved.
Sometime I wish I was like Truman on the Truman show, so everyone can see what's going on in my sitch, but I'm not, so glean what seems might work and ignore what doesn't.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
