I can see discussing it once. But if you have discussed it, and you haven't put it to bed, then I think it is your problem, not hers. If you haven't discussed it yet, then I think you should let her know that you know it's an uncomfortable subject for her, and you only want to discuss it once. And you would appreciate her help in you getting over it. And after the discussion, that's it. Never again. somehow I have this vision of you on your deathbed at 90 years old still wanting to go punch that guy's lights out!
Thanks Lotus,
NO we have not discussed it except for the day I found out ..what almost 3 years ago? That day she told me she was “in love” with him and was not sure if they had any future together. THAT day she told me that If I ever contacted him “It was over” between us. A LOT has happened since then...And things are pretty good BUT I have this feeling we are about at the same point when this all started. AND I believe if we would have spoken about our feeling way back then… That it would not have happened. YES I agree and thanks for the “intro” to the conversation. I was not planning on asking her to explain anything or try to justify what happened. I just wanted to get it out of my system and into the open what I am trying to deal with. Once It is out… unless she wants to bring it up again that is it… the only thing wrong with your “90 yo death bed scenario would be that the guy is 10 years older than me so that would make him 100
