Deju vu, but new to the online forum...round 2

[MrBond]

If your W is upset that you're wasting money moving out, then why on earth would you leave? If you are that strapped for cash, then maybe you can wait till you land a job before then.

IMO you have to start living for yourself and not have your life controlled by the whims of what your W wants. My W did the exact same things yours did in the beginning. Personally, I would tell her that you felt that you can't afford to move out right now so will be staying until you find a job. It shows you're responsible and are in control of your own life.

She may not like it, but that's her problem. You'll soon learn that it doesn't matter what you do, they will find reasons to dislike or hate you. They may not be rational, but then you realize that it's THEIR problem to deal with.

The tension she feels isn't because of you. It's because she chooses to feel tension.

I mean does it make sense that she's P.O'd that you are still around and also P.O.'d that you are going to leave and cost extra money? What does she expect? You can't have one without the other.

Once I hit the realization that no matter what I did, it wouldn't make my W happy, I started to stand up for myself and in turn it softened her stance.

So what happens if you move and you haven't landed a job in the two months you're out? How are you going to pay for your second place? If at that time you choose to move back out of necessity, your W will be even more upset. Trust me it happens. Doesn't make any sense, but that's the first thing to realize. That the WAS doesn't make sense. So control the only thing you can - YOURSELF.

But that's just my .02.