Antonia, I am so very sorry that your cat is ill. However, I do not buy this story from your h. It maybe has a grain of truth in it, but your h [imo] is using it to justify appalling behavior.
They tell themselves stories, and if your sister oversteped the mark and told him how upset you were, well, that fitted in with his world view, and gave him 'permission' to behave as he was doing
These people take no personal responsibility for their horrible actions and blame them on others. Do not let your immature husband drive a wedge between you and your sister. The worst case is that she did overstep the line, out of love and concern for you. Think about what happened. Seems to me you are all too ready to exonerate your husband.
They are emotionless and cold anyway. Their feelings have shut down. They truly do not care about anyone or anything but themselves and their lives. I have seen it time and again on these boards
