Granted, I'm not completely up to date on your sitch, but this jumped out at me and I wanted to comment ...
While all the points you make above are valid, what would be the PURPOSE in bringing them up? They are statements of past behaviour ... think more in terms of DB methodology ... solution oriented thinking. Instead of bringing up that she WAS affectionate in the first few years of the R (which will come across as critism etc) why not try to think back to what you were doing at that time which helped draw that behaviour out of her?
Oh ... and patience ... your sitch has many positives, don't forget to measure the small things, the small gains and improvements ... it's easy to get frustrated if we focus on only the big goals.
Peace PEI
Holding onto anger to punish someone else, is like lighting yourself on fire to get smoke in their eyes ~ 25yearsmlc
