Having a really hard time...

[Denver_2010]

I don't think that you have many options as far as the D process but to let it unfold, IF it does. When did she file? Is there a waiting period in your state? Here in Colorado there is a 90 day "cooling off" period bw the filing of D and it becoming final. The waiting period may give you a chance to DB. There are lots of situations where D has been filed but then cancelled or delayed before it becomes final.

Also, and I don't mean to be pessimistic on D becoming final, but there are lots of people who do remarry after D. I have read that there are 2 types of D. 1) legal divorce and 2) emotional divorce. Just because you have a legal divorce, does not mean that you necessarily have to give up on your R with W.

I read some very good advice on another thread somewhere here and that is - The decision of if and when to give up on M/R is YOURS and YOURS ONLY. So, you can make that decision when you are ready. I think that a legal D is irrelevant to this decision. JMO.