GOALS--for Surviving

[marie2235]

Hi!

This is my first time posting on this section of the board. Long story short - I have fought for my marragie - did everything I could - to no avail. My husband of 16 years has been having an EA/PA with a 20 year old kid. I filed for divorce about a month ago. It has been horrible.

He is making all kinds of threats and I am just worried about supporting myself and the kids. I recently went back to work after 13 years of basically being a SAHM - working on Saturdays only.

I want to move on, to forget about him - but, the fact that I am still so hurt and still get so upset and that every time I try to speak with my H, I end up in tears. It ends in an argument.

But, I need to look forward and to deal with what IS. In about 2 months, the D should be final. I think I am scared more than anything else. I have been with him since I was 17. I don't want to be alone - I'm afraid I won't find anyone to spend my life with - but, that would be a goal - to find a parter, a man I can count on.

I would like financial freedom - or at least knowing I can pay my bills and not have to worry. And I would like my kids to be happy. I want to be happy.

I think I am a little stuck right now - I don't know how to move on. This would still not be my choice. I am the one that filed - but, only becuase I had no choice. I couldnt' take it anymore - didnt' want my children to think that this is what amarraige is.

Any advice for someone still thinking...I wish...and what if... how do you move on? Setting goals is great. I have tried, but feel like I am stuck in the same place.