I can relate to whitneypinch. I get the same thing. I think that I need to move on for my own sanity. The WAS does this because they think they don't have any other choice. They will have to hit bottom before they realize what they have done.
The refusal to work on anything is maddening. It drives me crazy to figure that out, but may it's better to just let it go and move on.
M:39 W:37 Together: 16 years Married: 11 years Bomb: May '09 (ILYBNILWY) Moved out: Nov '09 D: 10, 8, 4