Kaboom

[girlfromipanema]

I think I meant "impossible situation" rather than "impossible decision" in my post above.

One of the texts OW sent me over the weekend said she "begged" him to ask me to come home when I moved out because no one could love him the way I do. That she couldn't pay his bills or make him dinner.

Is that why he asked me to come home? So I could give and give and give and be the wife I wanted to be: loving, caring, attentive, giving? H said she did tell him to ask me to come home and in the same breath said she couldn't live without him so he made the decision to ask me home and continue his affair with her for selfish reasons, because he loves both of us in different ways.

I have a hard time understanding how someone can love two people at the same time. Maybe the combination of OW and I make up the perfect woman for him and his selfishness overrode all sense of decency and fairness to me.

It embarrasses me that I was the only one unaware of the complexity of my marriage and life.

I was doing well and had moved on to a new chapter in my life, only to be sucked back in, believing that he loved me.