well I can say that I did read a thread by Cristalle in infideltiy jealousy several months ago where her h was so wrapped up in his EA that it did affect his sexual feelings towards his w he just couldnt do it. it was definitly only an EA because I believe the ow was on another contenant!
I would say his drive is a result of depression, thats my feelings.
your w could very well be telling you the truth or is just saying that as an attempt to get you to back off of her. I know I did. I dont see how she could lose those feelings so quickly while still talking to him. so I think she is trying to get you to back off. this is a tough place you are in because the more you try to get her to stop talking to him the more its going to drive her to him believe me I know!
as a matter of fact I beleive in my case the feelings would never have gone where they did if things had not been blown so out of proportion to begin with. honestly a day before the discovery of he and I talking so much to each other I realized I didnt have more then friendship feelings for him. I realized for sure it was just that things were so bad in my relationship and his that we were growing closer as friends and misinterpreting our feelings. I had decided I would stop talking to him recognizing what was going on with my feelings etc. well then there was this huge blow up and fighting and huge accusations that it planted so many seeds! as time went by of not being allowed to talk to him and having all these what ifs running through my head it turned into more then it was same with him. so when we started talking again and were there for eachother through even more hell thats when it really took off. so much could have been avoided in the begining. I think!
okay got to run for the day I will check back tomorrow Sue
