MR,

Significant or not, a mistake would be trying to read something

out of the behavior. The minute you figure she is coming to terms,

it won't be long for her to retreat again. This is still your time

to learn about you. I hated hearing these words too but you truly

have to do the work on yourself. I can easily come up with 10

situations like you have described but it does not change the

fact that they have to go through the journey. No stage guessing,

no expectations. Like Old Pilot has stated, you can only lay a

template over the behavior to discover the stages your W went

through AFTER the crisis is over. Sorry about that, I tried

to guess the stages too. It becomes a emotional frustration

that never ends.

My W and I are both separated now as the divorce is closing in.

She still baked me loads of Christmas cookies, gave me some

chili to put in the freezer,made sure I got a Christmas gift,

attended the same church on Christmas eve and gives me

"Friendship Hugs". What stage is she in? Batchit crazy stage.