I'm sorry he's still out to lunch and is still in the "entitlement" mode. I laughed when I read that he wants an IPhone for Christmas. I think it's time he realized that you are not there for just gifts and the grunt work. He should advise his OW of his Christmas wish and she should be the one purchsing the IPhone for him.
I do hope that you and your family have a nice Christmas together. It's tough when you have the mlcer zooming all of the place.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
