Update: Just wanted to talk about a few developments and give my thoughts on the process. Last night I was playing with my 14 month old in the kitchen and having quite fun time doing it. My other son was in the living room. I was also making dinner. My wife came in the front door from getting stuff in the car. She kinda paused for a second then she looked at me and said '"I've been thinking maybe we could go back to sleeping in the same bed. Maybe I have been to rigid in my boundaries." I was floored. I mean totally speechless. So I slept there last night after giving it a good thought. I didn't want to agree without truly thinking about it. Then today she text me to have lunch. We haven't had lunch in about a month and a half. In was fun to spend time w/o the kids.
I know the bed thing was a HUGE step for my wife. But I also 100% believe that she would not have brought it up if I had followed the DB process to the letter. (I had brought it up to her on Sat. night and it cause a minor fight). By contrast the lunch thing resulted from me following the DB process.
Which leads me to this thought. You have to believe 100% in what you are doing. I think many can spot "faking it" I know people here 100% believe in the DB process and that is great. When the follow it they are following it for themselves and the results will come. There are a lot of things about the DB process that I 100% believe in too. Don't get me wrong. It has been a help. But I've also had the guidance of a great IC who I also believe in and an our marriage counselor is also great. A great support cast can't be understated.
Just a few thoughts and hopefully some positive vibes for the board. I know it can get depressing here sometimes, but we need a place to talk.
I don't know where this will go, but I believe we are headed in the right direction now. I feel the changes in me.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
