Working on acceptance and forgiveness

[AntoniaB]

Thanks IB, Beatrice, TAMF and Punkin. I guess the main reason I feel I need to drop the rope is that in 6 months plus, not once has he wavered on the decision to divorce. It was only 3 days after he left and owned up to the OW that he said "I'm filing for divorce", and there is not one shred of evidence in all this time to suggest he was confused about that decision or wavering or wondering if it was what he wanted. Sure I don't know what's in his head, but the only indications I've ever gotten from him about his "path" have been that he is 100% sure. Last night I looked back at all the text messages from the past 6 months, and when I see things like this, "The truth is that I was attracted to her and my resolve was weak because of our marital problems", or, "Sorry it had to be this way, but you, Antonia, have to move on", or "I'm just not the right person for you but I'm the right person for her" or "I'm not pretending anymore, this is who I am", I think, my god, I wouldn't even be FRIENDS with someone like this. I just think that unlike some on this board whose WAS's are still showing signs of affection or love or even interest in them, even if they show it and then pull back, in my case, there is ZERO interest, affection, or love from his end. Only this unbelievable determination to prove to the world that what he did was right.

I just feel like it is pointless to hold on to the rope anymore. I really think he is one of the people MWD talks about, the "rare case person" who has "firmly let go of the marriage."