H's MLC - finding compassion and forgiveness

[Mila]

Thank you Shantilly - Few months back I went through my period of being "darkish" because I felt H was "cake eating" and felt taken advantage of....that gave me some space and I'd set some boundaries, but our R seemed to deteriorate more and more....now that I'm finding it more bearable to treat him as a "friend" I see that H is starting to take advantage of my "friendliness" and is "cake eating" again....have to watch it so I don't start feeling used and resentful.

Journaling -

Evening at FIL's went fine tonight....I was friendly, smiling, we even joked, exchanged few of our old inside jokes...which was interesting...talked about old times and overall had a very nice visit with his dad...I could see lots of the "old" H, but not quite....he seemed more distant then couple of weeks ago when we went to visit FIL....could be because OW is visiting him or because D was with us in the car...just seemed more distant.

Funny, we were talking about upcoming B-days and H said that he has his 55th coming up soon and his dad said "you should have some brains by now" (hinting on H leaving for OW) H replied "Mila probably thinks that I already had them but lost them again"...I didn't comment....

Another thing I don't know what to do about...H's sister, H & son are coming for a 10-day visit and H hinted that he hopes that they can stay at my house when they come....this is just too weird....I'm supposed to play host to his family while he is living in another place and likely will have OW there with him? And then he will be coming to my house to visit with them?....I just find it bizarre that he would even ask me....I'll be the one cooking, cleaning and entertaining them or how is this going to work? Just wondering if SIL called me last week (first time in a year) just so that she reconnects with me so they have a place to stay....don't know what to think about it all....