Need Insight III

[Denver_2010]

"I am in a business that has been struggling for a couple of years; let me tell you it takes its toll. The stress is enough to hurt your R even if it is unintentional. I used to complain about my W's spending, but did not want to discuss the job w/her to keep her from worrying - my mistake. I probably should have shared more and kept her "partnership" in our R. I don't have any advice to give, but you may want to assure your H that you are standing by him for "better or worse". Beneath the passion and romance you have to have a foundation of partnership and respect for each other. My W and I lost that and became too independent of each other, and then things spiraled out of control. The OM came along just when she was having a MLC and was vulnerable. Now I have a deep hole to dig our R out of."

I just saw this post from you on another thread. I am amazed how similar your situation is to mine. My biz has been struggle for the past 2 years too. I shielded my wife from what was going on with that and with our personal finances, yet I was suffering from the effects of the stress and became distant. We too became too independent of one antoher and things got out of control. OM came along while she was vulnerable and here we are!

I am being very hard on myself for not seeing this as it was occurring. I consider myself a smart person, yet I totally missed the boat with the thing that is most important to me.

How are you dealing with your role in what occurred? I am having a really hard time.