Moving to the next phase of what?

[cagzmom]

Funny, you think your done and that nothing will bother you and it does. Filled with lots of anger.. its ok I will survive... thats what I do.

X is moving about 1.5 miles from me.. into our old neighborhood, actually like pretty much on the same street, same house floor plan... with the new family. AND of course he is now trying to be "family man." PUKE!!

Because of this new move he now wants d14 earlier on Christmas. Shoot to be honest I don't even know who's holiday it is. He has NOT been even close to involved or tried in 4 years AND NOW he is coming back around??!!! soooo what do i do? d14 is sad..she feels like he is making anew family - so screw me??!! Whatever. It just [censored].

This is the part of divorce that is the hardest and the worst!

Last night I had a melt down. I cried like I haven't cried in probably 2 years. So much pain.. so tired of pain.

New guy and I are at a good place. A RIGHT place. Really trying to develop a friendship.. but with the holidays and he is going out of town with his kids after Christmas.. so he is "out" of my scope for awhile.

My heart is pretty tired.. the muscles have been used lots and lots lately.. good and bad. Just tired.