Come one Sandi...you absolute defense of the WAW is pretty sad. Sometimes people just do horrible things to each other. I have echoed those sentiments that you wrote to SBH in other posts (I called it feeling superior) I think its sad that the best you can come up with is that SBN never had an EA so he doesn't know. That's horse hockey. We can never walk in our spouses shoes so we can never know what they think/feel even when times are good. You have to have some communication with your spouse. It's key. I get it you think SBH is impatient. I would challenge you with this, you haven't experiences what he is going through so you can't say either.
In spite of what I wrote, I agree with the basic sentiment you expressed and have tried to convey that to SBH. But you really have no idea how hard it is to deal with this on a daily basis. You got to WA. You got to have your emotional needs meet by someone other than your spouse. You got that intoxicating feeling, an escape from the drudgery of married life. The LBS gets NONE of that and to them it seems unfair..even if they had a hand in it. Nothing, in my mind, excuses any affair. No action of the LBS could justify it. But the LBS is expected to take the lion share of the blame.
I am thankful that my wife at least had the decency to admit that she shares in the blame for our issues and and she said nothing I did excuses the EA. Unlike SBH, I love my wife dearly and cannot imagine being with anyone else for the rest of my years. I have loved her for 17+ years and that's what makes the EA so painful. So next time you get on your horse think of that.
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. --Jean Jacques Rousseau.
