Well, while I'm here I might as well post something about myself.
Less than a week till xmas now. I have DD through xmas and I'm not sure if I should invite STBXW over on xmas. My first reaction is no because at least for the first year she should feel the consequences of her decisions. On second thought though, it's more about DD, it would be nice for her to open her presents with mom there too. Then again it's obvious STBXW doesn't care about DD as much as I give her credit for it or else she wouldn't have given up on us. So in the end if STBX doesn't join us for xmas it's more a loss for DD than STBXW really. Then again, I can't give DD a lot of what's missing from her life now no matter how much I try, so it's also the reality of the situation. I guess we'll celebrate xmas separately acknowledging the things that are missing or are different...just like we do in our day to day lives now.
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
IR-- sadly, your daughter will need to adjust to having 2 separate Christmases because you will be divorced soon. Do you think it would confuse her or do you think she "gets" it? Mom and Dad together doesn't mean Mom and Dad are getting back together.
I see by the end of your stream of thoughts that you decided to keep it separate and that is best, IMO.
Out of curiosity, were you with your stbxW on Christmas 06? I see in your sig that she left in August of that year but it also looks like you may have spent 07-10 together for Christmas.
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Yes we always celebrated the past Christmases together because I wanted to reconcile with her. I had hopes that we would get past the rough patch in life and things will be all good again. Well I guess I was right except not realizing that it never works when the other person's not committed 100%. So, this time I concede there's no way to fix this oil spill
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again
Yes indeed...someone asked on piecing how to know when you actually are piecing, and the response I liked best basically said when the person who left is 'all in' and committed to working on things. No dragging feet or pulling teeth!
Whatever works best for you guys, that's what you should do. We are doing Christmas morning/Santa together and I plan to do that as long as my kids still believe... but he gets them Christmas Eve and I get them Christmas Day.
yeah I guess we all have different tolerances for being with our ex spouses...I can attend a dr. appt with him, tour daycares, but then think "divorced people don't share Christmas together"
To each his own, IR. Do what you want!
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
Looking at your new profile pic, I had to laugh at her being a tire gauge. What when you see that the *** isn't in the tread any more, time to change the tires??!!! LOL
kat
Me-53(and learning!) S24, S21, D18, D17 Just keep swimming, Just keep swimming. Dory
Exactly kat, see great minds think alike...and replay the image over and over again
But you tell me about the effectiveness...you're the owner, I'm just a customer lol
Me: 35|WAW: 38|D: 6yo | http://tinyurl.com/2dxx7m6 Feb 2006, left, came back in two weeks Aug 2006, left again Apr 2007, filed for divorce Dec 2007, reunited Mar 2010, moved out, filed again