they really come back

[mdoodles]

u can find my long posts under he is back i think, and he was back i think....

ive posted recently about how well ive been doing and how it seems h is sorry and only wants to hang out with me.

well wow, last night he was here to see son, we do get along well, all considering. and i turned him down big time in terms of sex. have to say im really proud and shocked with myself lol...

he told me the other day he isnt happy at home or with his decision.

my answer was - i refuse to feel bad for u. i refuse to feel bad for someone that i tried to so hard to make realize this would happen. u made your decision and i cannot go through this again.

last night i said, shouldnt u go home? wont she be looking for u? what do u say? u are working late like u used to tell me? i said, i just cannot do this, if u want sex, find someone random, i am not random, i dont do random, and if i did, it wouldnt be with u. he couldnt believe i can turn him down...he was all reminiscent, talking about my bedroom as his, his bed. i said no, u left this bed its no longer yours.

it really is amazing and satisfying that they do come back at some point and im rather surprised he is back so quickly, figured it would take much longer, like a good 5 years. and while it is satisfying, im over it and do not wish to reopen it.

if only now i could realize my exboyfriend will do the same lol...

for all of you on this board going through what i did, it will get better. unfortunately time is the answer and that [censored] but read my posts and see that it does get better, it really really does. and they do feel bad, all of them, even mine, who was so far gone.

gee, i wonder how psycho ow is feeling now, its not all they dreamed it would be over there it seems.....