Learning while in holding - pattern

[beastiemanager]

It has been some time since I posted, so I started a new thread. I attended status conference last Wed in court. H was there. I do NOT like his lawyer. He did a good job at trying to belittle me.

I mustered up the courage though, and I gave a time-line on the last 2 years events to the Court Commissioner and H lawyer.. I had written it up explaining why I did not want a divorce but stated that I knew there was not anything I could do about it, I was being forced into it.

The lawyer sat up and told me he wasn't interested in the time-line and it had no bearing, and said H could write a a paper telling why he felt marriage was broken. He then told me the Commissioner was not interested in the paper. But she was busy reading it. Lol. And she took it with her when she left and was still reading it.

I was angry with myself a little as I started to cry out of frustration and said to all in room that somebody needed to know what our family has been through for the last 2 years. I was not writing to belittle Mr. H. I accepted he was divorcing me as I have no choice.

It wsn't much that happened. Just set another date for another conference in Feb. I am seeking legal help as I didn't like that lawyer. I don't trust him. I thought I could do it on my own, but I will not take the chance on H word that I would be taken care of financially and home-wise. He may agree to do that, but I don't know about that lawyer.

So I am glad I gave that paper. I would never have done that before the crisis. I spoke right out and never did that before. I guess I have grown!

H was strange before conference while waiting. For the first time in 2 years he made definite eye contact with me for a long time. Like searching for something in my eyes.. Huh...weird. My D25 was there and said there was something definitely different going on with him.

Thanks for listening