Am I piecing? Just can't tell...

[angel61]

I have been searching for threads on what to do after EA ends and saw this, and just want to know that all your posts and ruminations are so helpful to me.So if you guys don't mind, I will add my story to yours so whoever gives you advice I can read too!
H's EA ended 11/26. H was depressed, wanted to try to reconnect with OW, and do a trial S, at that point I said no trial S, lets just D if you really want an OW in your life, and he backed off. I stated my desire to work on our M, and to do MC and retouvaille.This was all just 4 days ago. First time I ever set boundaries.
I now have been experiencing what all of you here are and have same questions.
I even have the same observation about looks - my H looks so good with all that MLC working out, that my physical attraction to him has come back full force. Good thing for my self esteem I have also lost weight and am looking good too. My dilemma is that during the time he had an EA, I became the initiator in ML, for a couple of reasons: did not want his EA becoming a PA for lack of intimacy, and also, it was a 180 for me as I had been distant.
Now I feel that I should hold back and wait for him to initiate, but I am not sure if that's the right thing to do....
I know the loss of control of the situation for him (he used to threaten me with S and I always backed off before) is making him resentful towards me. We used to have more fun conversations while he had EA, after that everything became strained. I used to show him affection during that time with hugs, would text him ILY every now and then. I wish I could do it again now but he seems colder, although there are friendly moments, so that I am now unsure.
I don't know if the fact that I am the female changes things when it comes to the physical side, as traditionally, the males are the more aggressive ones.