It'a All About Me

[Sanderika]

Hi GAG and Al,

First, I had contact with H yesterday, not about court instead it was about me doing something for the company. I spent the afternoon helping and was very successful and accomplished the task at hand. This has to go a long way for me....

I feel this should ring a bell with H that I am a very good person and that I am caring and considerate and generous. I have changed and this should be another star on my side of the board in my favor in H's eyes.

I have decided to try and make more contact with H. The upcoming holiday should present some opportunities for positive reinforcement of my actual true feelings and PMA.

GAG, to answer some of your questions....

The OW is still in the picture and inside my company. OW comes around once a week and writes payroll and payables payments. OW has no check signing privileges those still belong to H and I. Ow comes around and from what I can see acts like she is an owner there. You all might find me plumb crazy....I have not rocked this boat. I recognized defeat from the git go and was ever hopeful that OW will sink her own ship all by herself. I am still hopeful that this will eventually happen. H keeps her in the dark on many accounts and shares all with me. This is a fact as I know how to get verified information.

H has never lived with OW. H lives alone and has not ever entertained the ideas of living with her even though OW has pleaded and begged. OW lives and hour away and H lives 6 miles from me.

H filed for sure because of pressure from OW. In fact both filings in '08 and '10 were at her hand. I believe that OW was responsible for actual filings on H's behalf including getting signatures notarized illegally. Could explain why H on both initiatives had/has done nothing to follow through with the divorce proceeding requirements.

I think H wants to do the right thing. He states that he feels a divorce is necessary because of the past 5 years and the destruction that has been caused. H also states that he loves me and is still in love with me and always will be. He states that he now likes me very much and that his feelings of dislike have melted away. H says I am the girl he fell in love with. H has hesitation that my changes are for real. He wants us to be great friends and actually stated that he feels we will be better friends than we are right now even if divorced.

It is obvious that H does not want me out of his life maybe merely wants to be divorced. I asked my lawyer if we could simply divorce and not split assets. She said no and then said well maybe if we put it in no condition terms to protect you.

I am wondering today if H will come to his senses once he realizes our divorce will happen very quickly at this point in time.

Jody posed a good question, I can't test it with OW still in the picture. OW is a gold digger and has no intentions of leaving at this time.

I know for sure H and OW are not spending much time together since about mid October.

H has spent more time with son in the past 2.5 months than in the previous 60 months.

H told me that he dreams about me again.

H calls me and texts me a lot. H remembers conversations we have and little things I say and little things going on in my life.

I would have to say H has changed quite a bit. H has admitted to his faults in the marriage breakdown, albeit not very frequently.

I feel I have reason to be hopeful. I guess down deep, and you all know this is true, I was willing to go along with divorce if H insists, it is not truly what I want. If I can still save this marriage I aim to do it.

Thank you all so much my DB friends.

Cas, I hope you are having a great week with daughter.

Sanderika