I spent weeks in a fog, working with a smile on my face, dying for it to be time to come home, where I would slide into bed, take something to help me sleep, and just get away from it for awhile. The awful reality.
Wow, this is exactly what I do when I dont have the kids also, I cant wait to get home and then almost panic at the thought of going there, to an empty house with noone waiting for me. In the past I would have loved a day or hour or minute to myself, now it only comes with dread.
I am very disappointed with myself for letting him turn me into such a wreck. I need to find that pride you mention. I need to put on a brave face for my babies and let them know I am going to be ok. i hope to hell I will be ok.
Me 38 H 39 T 22years M 15years DS 14, DS 12, DD 6 Bomb 3/2010 h's 39th bday "Temporarily" Separated 6/7/10 H EA cant let myself believe anything more. H files 10/10
