Answers to those pesky 'why' questions are unlikely, but your post sounds like you already know that. It sounds like your H is trying to push the boundries you set, especially trying to 'talk' at work. Very likely that he is looking for reasurances too.
Your H doesn't sound like he is looking to do any meaningful reconnection. Be careful about getting your hopes up about getting any answers from him.
Don't rush this. If you decide to meet him, make sure it is when and where you are comfortable. Try to let go of your expectations and listen to him. You may not find out what you need to hear, but you may find out something. He is trying hard to tell you something. It may not be anything helpful, but who knows? Whatever it is, he sounds like he is spending a lot of energy trying to get to you.
Anyway, just .02 from a sleepy person on cold meds. Hope I was at least coherant.
