I am backed off and have been. I listen and validate. She is not staying at home tonight as she was leaving I reminded her kindly that If she needs me she knows my number. I complimented her on her attire. Lastly I said you may not want to hear this right now but I still Love you.
In your eyes you feel that you've backed off, but to her you are still pressuring. Giving her compliments on how she looks...as she is choosing to walk out the door instead of taking care of her 5 children, does not seem very attractive or appropriate, IMHO.
When you remind her "kindly" that you will be there if she needs anything......is opposite of what you need to do with a WAW. It shows neediness on your part, and it puts pressure on her. And no, she doesn't want to hear you tell her you love her! Stop doing that. If you really knew how it affected her....trust me, you would stop immediately.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
