It's malpractice to tell someone to always act as if. As your friend I would not give anyone that advice, I would say if it is bothering you then it is your responsibility to bring it up. In a mature , calm, direct, effective way and what the consequences are if the behavior continues. Now you have a choice instead of just acting as if. Acting as if can make you a victim. Neither attractive or healthy for you.
babble It's nice that you count me as your friend.
I believe you've misunderstood. Everyone is always acting as if. That means that at any given time you are acting under a set of assumptions. Our assumptions are just that--assumptions. You choose your assumptions whether you think you do or not. Granted, they are informed by something, but the assumption is about the future. And the information from which an assumption is formed is limited, not all-encompassing.
Acting as if CAN make you a victim, and that would be the as if attitude.
The AS IF attitude in divorcebusting is about the attitudes that are self-fulfilling prophesies. But you know that.
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.