All that you say pertains in simplistic terminology to healthy communication/assertiveness. These I think can be looked at more as honed skills instead of just personality traits. If I had to assume anything I bet your H tuned ouorgor the sake of peace because of your "strong" as opposed to "gentle" approach. But there was a real nan with feelung and opinions in there. Sometimes men will get passive aggressive instead as a way to cope with the problem. Hey, but you seem to be aware and back on track! You truly were and are committed! How about the spiritual side?