The past two evenings, the W has called the house and i wasnt home, so she calls my cell and asks, "You're not at home, where are you?" I just responded that i was out. Next she asks about our S speech therapy. How are you going to handle it? I said i figure since you took off work, you would bring him over. She said, Its your time with him you can pick him up. I said i would assume you would participate in his therapy, She said very loud and angry, i am participating when i am with him, That is such a nasty comment, you are so nasty. I said i didnt mean it to be nasty, i am sorry you feel that way, i just assumed we would participate in his therapy together. She said just text me or call when you are picking him up. I said ok have a great evening, and she hung up. Sounds like she is trying to get me to pop off in an angry way. Still taking it day by day and maintaining....
M - 42 W - 41 Married 9 years July 24, 2010 WAW moved out 8-9-10 2nd Marriage for Both S 2 SS 13 from W first Marriage
every interaction with W now while exchanging the baby, she asks where i am going. I dropped him off on Thanksgiving morning. She said, i dont know why you are trying to get rid of him so early. You know we dont have dinner until 4. I said it is difficult with the entire family being over here. She said" Call it like it is, you are going somewhere. I picked him up the next morning and had him til Monday morning. He was very sick and i had to stay home from work. When she picked him up, she thanked me for taking such good care of him. Then again she asks, Where are you going now? If she left, why does this concern her. I also noticed she is checking the bank account again, which nothing in it is hers any longer. Why would she care? Nothing malicious, but what does it matter?
M - 42 W - 41 Married 9 years July 24, 2010 WAW moved out 8-9-10 2nd Marriage for Both S 2 SS 13 from W first Marriage
I am so sorry for you but right now I have a WAH but I think I am your W....had two babies back to back and had post partum depression. Finally fixed it after my daughter but stopped medication and it lead I believe to my husband leaving... Make her feel special right now - needed - not so much as t mommy but as a women if that makes sense - compliment her --- dote on her and appreciate her
I am so sorry for you but right now I have a WAH but I think I am your W....had two babies back to back and had post partum depression. Finally fixed it after my daughter but stopped medication and it lead I believe to my husband leaving... Make her feel special right now - needed - not so much as t mommy but as a women if that makes sense - compliment her --- dote on her and appreciate her
thanks, what does dote on her mean? Never heard it before. Sounds like you are alike, can you give me some more outstanding suggestions, they are appreciated.....
M - 42 W - 41 Married 9 years July 24, 2010 WAW moved out 8-9-10 2nd Marriage for Both S 2 SS 13 from W first Marriage
This past wednesday, she showed up at the house unexpectedly for our babies speech therapy. The therapist looked at me with a smile and gave me a thumbs up when W stepped out of the room, I whispered she was probably going to give me some bad news. She kind of hung around for a few minutes, but we didnt talk, it was kind of weird, then she hugged the baby and left. Thursday afternoon, she called me to tell me the sitter was closed on Friday. I told her i had a drs appt, which i did. It was for an EMDR therapy session. She threw a huge guilt trip on me. "I dont see why you are being so inflexible, if you really loved your son as much as you claim, you would reschedule your appt. I really need that therapy, but I did end up rescheduling and taking my son who ended up being very sick that morning. I had to take him to the doctor for chest xrays etc. I almost broke down, it was so painful. Because this should be a team effort for our son, and i felt very alone handling it all on my own. ITs just me and my baby in this huge house all weekend....difficult when youre whole family should be together....
M - 42 W - 41 Married 9 years July 24, 2010 WAW moved out 8-9-10 2nd Marriage for Both S 2 SS 13 from W first Marriage
"I almost broke down, it was so painful. Because this should be a team effort for our son, and i felt very alone handling it all on my own. ITs just me and my baby in this huge house all weekend....difficult when youre whole family should be together...."
Yet.. But, these are the moments that define you as a person do they not?
Tell me what worked the last time you DB'd?
"Weird thing, is this has happened every 3 years almost to the month."
So you can clearly see the cycle. Why did you come full circle again?
"Once we reconciled the last time, i asked her to promise me, if it got bad again, grab me by the hands, sit me down, and tell me its bad again."
Are you really gonna tell me that you need her to hand hold you thru this? Did you really not see it coming.. again?
"She threw a huge guilt trip on me. "I dont see why you are being so inflexible, if you really loved your son as much as you claim, you would reschedule your appt. I really need that therapy, but I did end up rescheduling and taking my son who ended up being very sick that morning."
Don't let her push you into a corner. Or.. don't let her drive your life from "her house". 99% of this stuff is controlling things where you can and being smart enough to see the chances.
What is weird to me.. is this post was your best one. It showed some emotion. Answer the questions.. think about them. Don't give me canned answers.
Relax Eat Think Act normal React.. Smartly. Do something different. Emulate. Do Work.
