I just wonder ... do you think it might be possible that you're 'overfunctioning' about her problems, in a subconscious way to avoiding having to deal with your own hurt, anger and pain over what happened?
What is it that YOU need from this M, CL?
FMV, No, I don't think I'm avoiding emotional pain. I get up most mornings to write in a journal and write poetry. I keep myself connected to feelings and express them and articulate them.
The second question is more difficult to answer quickly and will require some reflection. I prefer the words want or desire or expect. I'm at work so will respond some morning from my home computer. Maybe the way to answer the question is think what I want for myself in terms of my life, and see where M would fit into that.
I do believe that it's important for me to express my desires in our dance partnership, instead of me simply going along with her whims, or her venues or her favorite dances. The dance partnership is giving me an opportunity to express my desires into the partnership. It's important for me to be checking to make sure I'm not being overly accomodating, under the guise of being helpful or not respecting my desires.
She hasn't attended dance class this week. I was able to get her to practice by taking my shoes to exercise class, and encouraging us to practice after class, rather than her settling in at home. She doesn't like either of the dances we've been working on. the one dance is difficult, and most students are struggling with it. I think I would be neglecting my needs by dropping out of the competition. I think there needs to be a balance between stretching ourselves, and making things to easy. I'll stay quiet for now, and see what happens at our next private lesson. The teacher has a responsibility to guide us thru this, and prepare us for the competition.
CL
CL 53 W 54 M 20 yrs. 03'-09' Separation + Old Patterns + GAL 10-14' Piecing
"The Master allows things to happen. She shapes events as they come."
