Standing firm on no communication with H. Its been less than a week since he moved next door. I realized last night that I am more comfortable with him gone. I don't know if that is bad. I also realized that if a D goes through I will be fine. I'm not going to rush it but I have set a end date( for myself, H doesn't need to know). If this is still going on by July I will end it myself. I'm only 43 and I want a life too! I figure if nothing has changed by then it probably won't. In the meantime I have two lovely children still at home and a bunch of things I haven't done in a long time that I want to start doing again. I have actually improved a lot since summer even if H doesn't notice or care. I have lost 65 pounds, regularly go to the gym now. I've become calmer and more interested in stuff again. I've been at home for awhile but I'm now considering going back to work. I do hope my M has a turnaround but I'm going to be realistic because it might not and I don't want to sit here spinning my wheels in the meantime.
