I told her not to contact me, and that if she needed to get any communication to me, then she should go through her father.
When it comes to words, often less is more. There really isn't a need for telling her. Just be busy living your life,having fun, finding forgivness (for you), healing, figuring out which direction you want to head and so on. Your actions will speak so much louder than any words.
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Any suggestions on what to do if she does not honor that?
So what if she tries to contact you. You can be unavailable if that is your choice. What are you going to do if she does? Tell her off?? Throw some more drama into the mix? Why give her that control over you?
Let's face it Mike, if you're not yet D'd, you will most likely still have to have a little contact with her until everything is said and done.
If you want to communicate with her through her father that is your choice. This is just my opinion and I'm not at all saying be her best buddy right now but treating her with respect and communicating with her about only the issues at hand when you absolutely have to would seem like a stronger way to go about it.
You get to decide who you want to be and how you want to handle yourself. Try your best not to let your emotions run the show.
