It's not over till it's over right?

[awest1217]

With H's school, H almost lost his job not due to the affair, but because of all the problems it caused like students not wanting to be in the room with him and OW, or teachers complaining because OW was in H's room instead of with her kids, etc.

I am also not pushing you to expose because in my case it made life really hard for a while, but don't be bullied as well. I also thought about if H lost his job what would happen, but really, everyone at the school already knew something was going on so me saying something was not the issue, and for me I finally had to remember that I can't take responsibility for H's actions. H is having an affair and not me.

Do what you feel is best, but don't live in fear. Don't live pretending either. Also do a little research. Find out what would really happen. I am with NM, I don't believe H would be fired for having an affair unless it has affected his teaching (like my H), otherwise the board would have no ground to fire.

I also agree with NM on how all WAS will "hide" the affair until the D is over. My H is still wearing his wedding band, but living with OW. He doesn't want to be seen as the "bad guy", but when people see him with OW right after our D they will know.

Stay strong. Take care of yourself because this is such a hard thing to deal with, and you need all the energy you can.