I agree with Silly and Young...

Get professional help or get out because this problem will not go away on its own and it seems beyond something you can fix on your own...

(Formerly blgp)
Me-35
H-33
Married 4 yrs
Together 9 yrs
"Bomb" 8/1/10
Separated 8/6/10
D filed 10/21/10, on hold til 1/11

"If you want to hear God laugh, tell Him about your life plans."