I was catching up on your sitch and had to laugh to myself. On the first page you said about your wife being treated like a 5 year old etc.
That is exactly how my H's parents and step-parents treat him and he does whatever they say. And he says I was controlling which I never was, it makes me wonder.
I honestly believe that H's families are the biggest problem right now and all through the S because he doesn't have the you know what to tell them anything but what they want to hear.
So instead of doing what he wants as far as our M goes, he does what they tell him to do. I know it's cause of the stories he made up so he wouldn't look like the bad guy for leaving but this is crazy.