So I don't really know where to start and I could ramble on forever so I'm going to try and write an abbreviated version of my issue....
I have been with my current husband for the last 20 months. We met in April of 2009 and almost immediately moved in together...I know I know...not a good idea, but I felt so connected to him...we had so much in common and he acted like he was so into me. He would constantly tell me how he loved me, loved me body, that I drove him crazy and although his technique for love making wasn't the best...I didn't care. I craved this man like no other I'd been with before. We had sex relatively frequently for the first 3 months and all of the sudden...boom...it stopped. No sex for 2 months straight. At first I was reluctant to say anything for fear he would tell me I was a turn off to him, but it finally got to be too much so I confronted him and asked him what was going on. He got very defensive and gave little in the way of answers, but said he would be "better" and more attentive. Things, however, did not change but I started monitoring his internet activities and noticed that he was looking at pornography A LOT. Again, I confronted him asking why he would pass up a real live woman to please himself in front of the computer. For about 7 months this was a constant fight and finally he had to stop watching porn because the computer broke. Actual intercourse increased a bit, but his lack of attention to my pleasure got worse and worse. He seems completely disinterested in any of my female parts, avoids touching me and love making just turns out to be me pleasing him until he climbs on top of me and "gets it over with". I'm left feeling like nothing but a prostitute as it seems like it could be anyone "servicing" him. Not to mention the fact that my self esteem has suffered in a HUGE way...I feel like I disgust him in some way. We continually fight about the issue and he always makes excuses like..he was with a woman once whose hygiene was bad so he can't get over it and he doesn't know what his problem is. He admittedly masturbates daily but says he doesn't have a high sex drive. Wouldn't someone without a sex drive not want any type of sex? Bottom line...I wonder if he's gay and can't stop wondering what's wrong with me that he doesn't want to be with me. I'm to the end of my rope...any advice? Does this sound similar to anyone????
