Is the OM still in contact with her?

It is possible to get over this. Here is a thread I keep as reference. You living together still is a big plus.

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2033291&page=46

M-43 W-40
2D - 9 and 5

Emotion, yet peace.
Ignorance, yet knowledge.
Passion, yet serenity.
Chaos, yet harmony.
Death, yet a new life.

RECONCILED AND WISER