I made the mistake of saying something to my mother-in-law about OM because I don’t have a big support group. I asked her to keep it between us and she agreed so I hope that happens. I told my parents but they have no contact with my W. My situation is somewhat different b/c we had gotten into swinging and I first REALLY noticed pulling away with an EA with one of the guys that we swung with and she was talking to constantly and was “a friend” and my W wasn’t giving up friends for me. I can understand exposing so that they have to face the real world b/c I think my W is enjoying the secrecy. Family can be dangerous, I slipped with my mother-in-law and I know my sister-in-law is pushing my W to divorce because she thought I was bad for W from the beginning.
The snooping is poisonous. It is what really brought things to a brink for my M and has made me sick. Knowing my W is having an EA/PA right now is killing me and the thoughts are so hard to stop. Those sick feelings are very real on a physical level and the only way I have found to stop the pain is to stop the snooping.
I like 25yearsmlc description about justification. I committed a lot of wrongs and I am attempting to be empathetic about why she is doing this…very tough but necessary. If my W can forgive me for my wrongs I believe I can forgive her for all of this. Still don’t know if I’d ever want details about her general dating and OM or not.
