I wish I had those all knowing answers, but I don't.

For all the years I spent waiting for my H to defog I waited too long to get myself unstuck. I finally did, and made a life I enjoyed while still being roommates with H, and whatdoyaknow he started peaking at my/our life again.

You have been busy with health and school and kids and grandkids, is any of that something that draws H back? What are his interests?

Maybe the best you can do is keep taking care of you, protect yourself financially and emotionaly, and live happy.

Live your life while you are still living.
Riding the trail less traveled.