Positively moving forward

[Lucky11too]

Trust me, I completely understand. All morning, I have been asking God, why do I have to deal with this? (see my newest post =/) It’s hard b/c emotionally this is what I am feeling, but mentally, I know it’s not helping me either. You have been thru a lot, more than most people, but I’m a religious person too, and I do believe that God has a plan for our lives and a reason for the trials we face. I don’t know what the reason yet and being in the middle of it feels awful and unbearable sometimes. I hope one day we will be able to look back and it will all make sense. My sister told me an inspirational story when I was going thru one of these “woe is me” moments not too long ago about (summary version) a woman who got breast cancer and had to go thru all the pain and suffering of chemo and finally surgery and kept asking “why me, God?” I forget the exact circumstances but later in her life, she had the opportunity to go on a missions trip overseas and saw all the suffering. She understood their suffering and had a heart for them and made it her lifetime mission to help those people. She came to realize that if God had not allowed her to go thru her own suffering, she never would have been able to truly understand their suffering. Not that we are meant to be missionaries per se, but the bottomline is that God has a plan for our lives. I know this is hard time right now with the finalization of the D, another wedding anniversary and the holidays, but like I said before, take the time to grieve the loss, and also take care of you. And at least for me, whenever I’m feeling super down, giving S a hug reminds me that even though I’ve been thru so much, how lucky I am to have the best thing of all!