Need Insight II

[angel61]

This is what i did during the time my H was talking about D a lot, and about how all he wanted was to be free, and that he did not feel our marriage was working. One day, I told him:

1. Lets put ourselves aside first and think of our daughter. Our most important role right now is to be parents.
2. Lets assume that once daughter is grown up we will go on and S
3. But while we are together, can we make our life tolerable - lets try to have fun, be friends, talk about fun things
4. And if we felt we couldn't stand it anymore before our daughter was independent, we will cross the bridge when we get there.

I also let him know that I could no longer be angry, that what he did with OW hurt me and it was his choice to keep hurting me and that I could not do anything about it.

That way, whenever he would bring up anything about it, I would just remind him that we already had agreed on something before, so I did not want to talk more. Although to be honest, we did talk about it bitterly once in a while, but it did allow us to have a couple of weeks in between talks consisting more of just the logistics of daily life.