Happy Anniversary to me. One year ago today, WAW officially walked away and moved out of our house. What a year it's been. My personal growth has been exceptional, but after a conversation yesterday, I know we are no closer to reconciliation that a year ago.
While talking about vacation, I decided it was time to tell WAW something clearly and succintly. I am ready for her to come home and end all this stuff. While she did not say never, she certainly was much less than thrilled about the idea. I said I didn't expect anything right away, but want us to work towards that, rather than the other way.
So...unless she tells me something different, I have decided what I am going to do. I will continue with my current method of being friendly etc and will be an awesome guy on family vacation at XMAS. If the status quo remains the same, I will start the new year as a new man.
I will go dark and put all my efforts into my post marriage life. I have done everything possible to save my marriage in the last year, have become a much better man, father and employee and can move on, knowing that I have literally done what others only claim to have done - everything thing I could to honor my vows.
I won't make a big show of things, but will simply tell WAW that I now know she will never be able to forgive, trust and accept me to the point that we can have a beautiful life together and that I have finally given up hope of that happening.
It sure has been one hell of a year, but I am so much stronger today than exactly one year ago. I am proud to be me.
