"I want to be his friend but coach thinks for my cooling off period I should just stick to talks about the kids and the finances."

Why did the coach recommend that?

Need help?

"I have some internal trust and self esteem issues I need to work on right now."

You listed Trust first.. so that is what is most important to you.

He needs to earn that. You can't fix that on your own.

So for now.. we throw Trust away.

Self Esteem.

What is it? Why did you loose it?

"we cant go back to the way our marriage was."

OK.. gimme some heartfelt words that explain where you want to be.

Who is Hopeless29?

What does she have to offer?

Understand.. that I am gonna hold you to the words.. "You can't go Back."

Relax
Eat
Think
Act normal
React.. Smartly.
Do something different.
Emulate.
Do Work.

Lets get "RETARDED" in here.