Barb, Went back and read a little bit of your thread here and there....you are very clear on the techniques and tactics but your focus is on the marriage.......
Sounds funny doesn't it?????
That is what we are here for is to focus on the marriage....
right????
Well, in order to focus on the marriage you first have to focus on you.
YOU are NOT focusing on YOU.
YOU are contemplating what HE will THINK if you give him a gift or not......
WHO CARES WHAT HE THINKS IN HIS WHACKED OUT MIND WHICH I DOUBT HIS BRIAN IS ACTUALLY ENGAGED IN.
I am not telling you to give up on him.......
BUT
rather turn from HIM right now.......
Do YOU feel like giving him a gift??????
IF so....then give one.
IF not....don't.
IT is ALL about how you FEEL right now......NOT him.
We know how he feels, effed up, confused, wanting some ideal of the past, WHATEVER.....WHO CARES!!!
Start focusing on BARB and what makes BARB feel good.....what used to make BARB feel good before BARB met BARD's Husband.
DO not tell me that BARB's Husband makes you feel good.
He can not make you feel anything, and if he could then lately he has been making BARB feel like sh!t. But he can't so the mods will strike that as it is of no use here.....
or is it???????
Barb, Seriously, tell me what you are doing for you.....I can tell you that your H is still interested in you....and the life he had/has with you and his kids.....but that is it, he is just interested, nothing more. When you show him that you can be HAPPY without him and that his kids can flourish w/o him....
Then and ONLY then will he move from being "interested" to starting to move back to you.
Formerly "missherlove"
Me49 XW49 M17 T19 S16 D20
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power, and the fear of freedom shrinks and vanishes. You are free.
