I said to the effect you need to do what you need to do but I let her know she was still wanted/welcome by us at home.
She may percieve the welcome mat as pursuing, so be careful.
I am having a similar problem with my W who cancelled her planned trip to visit OM out of fear that I will expose her. So she doesn't like me at all right now. One night she'll sleep in our bed; then the next few nights she'll sleep on the couch. Very prone to act out of her mood swings.
I have totally elimninated all semblence of pursuit, and if she wants to talk (which usually means dropping some new bomb) I just listen and try not to get angry.
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."
