Congratulations Barb...you sound as if you've finally reached the "other side" of all of this. You held onto your anger for a very long time. But now it's time to let it go.
Chuck stepped up for both Ryan AND for you during this crisis. The decent loving man does still exist somewhere deep inside -- and he chose to bring him forth. And I suspect that it probably cost him with Maggot. So he is definitely stronger than before and perhaps finally waking up from the fog. And you're right...it is odd how "letting them in" is actually a letting go.
You know I've said for all these long years we've both been here -- that the opposite of love is NOT hate...it is indifference.
It is a state some never reach. It sounds as if you've finally passed through the burdensome "hate" stage and are now entering a brand new phase.
I applaud your decision to now allow Chuck to come to your home - b/c you're right it would be very cruel to just cut him out of the loop after what's transpired the past 2 weeks.
And with you now in the lead in demonstrating your new level of forgiveness...your children will follow -- and that is the most wonderful gift you could possibly give all of them.
I know with my precious son who passed away...that he was most definitely our greatest teacher and exuded only love and grace as I am certain is the same way with your precious Ryan... I know I always sought to raise my game higher b/c of having been honored to have been entrusted with his care and blessed to know him -- even if for such a short time. This came to mind...
