Journaling: I am settling in to the idea of being a single mom. I have more time for myself, and since H helps with D way more now than when he was home, I get to focus on enjoying my time with my D when she is here.
I do want to find a way to spend more time at home with my girl, but that will be a long term project. My approach to custody is going to be that I want to be the parent with the most time available to care for her. My H exposing D to OW knocked him off his pedestal and I am not happy about some of the things he is ‘teaching’ her while playing out his MLC fantasies either.
H called to see about picking up the stroller to take D on a run in the morning. Hope OW is not going running too, but I am resisting the urge to check those phone records again.
H also wanted to know if I knew where I wanted to go for dinner tomorrow. That surprised me because I had assumed the invite was to the weekly family dinner at his parent’s house.
Guess not.
That is ok. He has said before that being around me and his family at the same time is ‘uncomfortable.’ He has also said that he is tired of being around his parents. I do think he is still trying to separate me from the rest of the family too though. Just curious, but does anyone know, if ‘uncomfortable’ is MLC lingo for ‘extreme guilt and shame?’ Hmmmm…
I thought about it for a while after he called, and decided to treat dinner tomorrow as a ‘DBing date.’ I will dress a little extra nice. I will allow myself to have no expectations. I will be relaxed and maintain a good PMA. This has had good results in the past. I’m not expecting anything, but I might as well plant a few seeds for the future while I am around him anyway.
Almost forgot, emailed this morning to tell H I had ordered an extra insurance card for D for him to keep with him and had stuck it in her day care bag. Let him know we are going to put up the tree this weekend and told him he is welcome to come if he wants to and has time. No mention of it on the call. The tree will go up with or without him though, and it will be fabulous!
