I agree with all of that. I ventured into dating this time last year--two years after the bomb and 11 months after my now-ex had moved out, again, but forever this time...
I realized pretty quickly that I was not ready, so I stopped after 2-3 dates, all with different guys. I took most of 2010 to work on me (counseling, working with a trainer, talking to my pastor, building my life).
Now that I have decided I want to date again, I have also realized that I am not looking for an immediate relationship. A good friend of mine has said a lot that he wants to 'fall in love'. I don't! To me falling is something that happens by accident, you have no control in it... When the time comes that I love someone again I want to 'jump in love', by my choice...
I also cringe when I hear (not on this thread but in other places) people talking about 'needing' someone, or needing that love or affection. I don't need it, but I have decided that I do want to spend time with someone who makes me laugh and whose company I enjoy. And I don't want to rush it, move too fast, and become an instant couple with someone.
